Thursday, September 09, 2010

Where Have I Been???

Things have been insane. Sam started school mid-August, and I am running around like the proverbial headless chicken. I am excited because I am getting closer to applying to graduate schools. I am nervous because I am getting closer to applying to graduate schools. I am taking 4 classes this term (5, if you count the one that is an anatomy class/lab combo as 2 classes). It is overwhelming, but good to have a big workload. I feel as though I am learning how to juggle more this way, which I am sure will be useful very soon.

In the meantime, Greg is turning 40 on the 12th. This has been difficult for me. Growing up as a pastor's kid, I have seen way too many single elderly people being lonely and sad to not care about Greg getting older. You are probably thinking,

"Dude, Crystal. You're the one who married a 32-year-old when you were 21. You asked for it."

And I think that to myself too. But then I remember how *worth it* Greg is--how much I cherish and love him and how God brought us together in a way that we couldn't have helped falling in love, even if we hadn't wanted to (which I actually kind of didn't at the time). But yeah, I am anticipating the last part of my life being spent alone. And that is hard. But this is how I prepare myself for things--I have to think about the worst because I hate being caught off guard more than I hate anticipating the inevitable.

For now, I am loving every minute I spend with my husband. And I am loving our kids, too. Which brings up another topic. Sam--he is preoccupied with death these days. A while back, my Great Aunt Ada passed away. Sam knew her and her death really impacted him. He keeps asking us when we are going to die--how old we are--if we are "healthy". Greg sees it as a sign of depth of character on Sam's part. It makes me feel bad for Sam, though. I don't want Sam thinking about these things. I want him being a kid--having fun chasing the animals/his sister around the house... pummeling things. But he does do those things too. So I guess he's ok. I guess I don't need to worry until he starts dressing like Greg did in high school, right?

2 comments:

Rachel Ann said...

Haha...that last line was funny.

About your worries about spending your last days alone - right now I'm caregiving for a 93-yr-old who is 8 years older than his wife and 10x healthier. You may not be alone at all. Maybe you'll even die before him. Comforting thought, right? ;)

Crystal K said...

I don't exactly "pray" for that, Rachel, but...