Thursday, September 09, 2010

Where Have I Been???

Things have been insane. Sam started school mid-August, and I am running around like the proverbial headless chicken. I am excited because I am getting closer to applying to graduate schools. I am nervous because I am getting closer to applying to graduate schools. I am taking 4 classes this term (5, if you count the one that is an anatomy class/lab combo as 2 classes). It is overwhelming, but good to have a big workload. I feel as though I am learning how to juggle more this way, which I am sure will be useful very soon.

In the meantime, Greg is turning 40 on the 12th. This has been difficult for me. Growing up as a pastor's kid, I have seen way too many single elderly people being lonely and sad to not care about Greg getting older. You are probably thinking,

"Dude, Crystal. You're the one who married a 32-year-old when you were 21. You asked for it."

And I think that to myself too. But then I remember how *worth it* Greg is--how much I cherish and love him and how God brought us together in a way that we couldn't have helped falling in love, even if we hadn't wanted to (which I actually kind of didn't at the time). But yeah, I am anticipating the last part of my life being spent alone. And that is hard. But this is how I prepare myself for things--I have to think about the worst because I hate being caught off guard more than I hate anticipating the inevitable.

For now, I am loving every minute I spend with my husband. And I am loving our kids, too. Which brings up another topic. Sam--he is preoccupied with death these days. A while back, my Great Aunt Ada passed away. Sam knew her and her death really impacted him. He keeps asking us when we are going to die--how old we are--if we are "healthy". Greg sees it as a sign of depth of character on Sam's part. It makes me feel bad for Sam, though. I don't want Sam thinking about these things. I want him being a kid--having fun chasing the animals/his sister around the house... pummeling things. But he does do those things too. So I guess he's ok. I guess I don't need to worry until he starts dressing like Greg did in high school, right?


Rachel Ann said...

Haha...that last line was funny.

About your worries about spending your last days alone - right now I'm caregiving for a 93-yr-old who is 8 years older than his wife and 10x healthier. You may not be alone at all. Maybe you'll even die before him. Comforting thought, right? ;)

Crystal K said...

I don't exactly "pray" for that, Rachel, but...